I’m currently writing my final ever assignment at Queen’s University. Okay so I still have two exams to do but I’m still feeling all reminiscent and what not.
For those of you who know me you’ll know I didn’t have the best start to university life… I won’t get into the details because blah blah blah but it’s made me realise that everyone puts so much pressure on you to have THE BEST TIME OF YOUR LIFE at university.. well it’s kind of a load of crap. I’m not saying uni is awful, far from it, I’ve had the best time in my third year because I didn’t put the pressure on myself to have a great time… I’ll try and make my jumbled words coherent hang on I’ll start a new paragraph to mark the new sense of making sense.
Ah there we go nice and fresh.
Basically what I’m saying is 18 year olds put a lotta pressure on themselves (because of what everyone else says!) to have an amazingly wild time, partying 24/7 while getting great grades and making the best friends ever and living on your own for the first time and everything. Like seriously?! Life isn’t a fairytale, how can all of things happen to everyone that goes to uni? No. A lot of people manage to nail the balance really early on, YAY for them, genuinely I’m seriously happy for them, they’re the lucky ones! But for lots of people it doesn’t work out that way. You get lumped in with a group of people you don’t know or particularly like, they’re messy and have a totally different style of music and life to you (see how I put music first because music IS life preach it innit)….but you’ve gotta somehow live with them, and make friends elsewhere while putting up with those bozos (that’s it, I’ve officially fallen into the skater-boy/ Dad 90s). Hmm, its tough one. Join societies etc? Yah sweet, that’s a good way of doing it. But what if you’re not a hard core party animal? I hate how much university socialising is based solely around alcohol… like maybe I’m in a minority here but still, it’s not fair for the few people who don’t make friends based on alcoholic beverages. But then again, it legit may be just me… I just wish someone had warned me.
Anyhoo, I’ve forgot the point of what I’m saying. Oh yeah, the point is we should stop putting pressure on everyone to have the best time ever and be more realistic.. it’s gonna be crap sometimes, the work may get tough, you may end up hating people you convenience-friendshipped, you may get homesick and that’s totally fine! Uni is a good proxy for life, it’s great sometimes and shite sometimes and you have to learn to get on with people you have nothing in common with and you find friends that will last a lifetime when you’re not expecting it….
As soon as I stopped putting pressure on myself to adore uni, I ended up having the best year of my life. I stopped saying yes to things purely because I thought I should do them and started being myself. Weirdly it worked perfectly. I BECAME MYSELFand realised my potential, I started saying yes to things I WANTED to do and spending time with people I wanted to see. I realised I had friends that would jump through fire for me, and I would for them. True friends that I hadn’t appreciated the value of, and now I couldn’t live without them. No pressure makes for a happy life and its nice that I can truly say I’m HAPPY.
So to anyone starting uni soon, don’t take this as me saying its crap. It really isn’t! Just start out without putting pressure on yourself and you’ll learn what it took me years to learn. Be yourself from the start and you’ll enjoy yourself waaaaay more. And if sometimes you find things crappy? That’s fine too! Don’t beat yourself up for it. Just be chill and you’ll get through uni and be a stronger and better person at the end of it.
let yourself BE yourself and you’ll fly through life
Okay gotta finish this damn essay now….back to Victorian grave analysis..