So a while ago I wrote about long distance friendships being a pain in the royal donkey but this time I have more stuff to say that’s not all as negative and not all about just friends so I figured it was time I explained in more detail the issues of living in a different country from everyone and everything you love..
After saying goodbye to the boy at the weekend, I realised how funny it is how people unexpectedly become so important to your life without you consciously seeing it happen. Like little worms weedling there way in and then you’re stuck with them and you have worms. (I’m kidding so hard please don’t take me seriously oops.) What I’m trying to say is that sometimes it works being miles away from each other, albeit a whole sea in between may be excessive but it’s only a small sea so I can’t complain, other people have time differences to deal with (love and kisses to you folk, that must be so awful). Anyhoo I mean being apart can make you both grow as individuals and grow up a lot, and then reconnect when you finally see each other and just have fun and be ridiculous and not worry about having to maintain any responsibility. Trust me, I’ve been through CRAP long distance relationships… when they’re fraught with trust issues, jealousy, over-clinginess, lack of control over each other and feeling like youre losing them or contrastingly being suffocated. But its down to the people involved and how you’ve matured in life etc. NOT the distance. Idk I’m writing this post mainly because some of my friends have just embarked on new relationships with dudes from other countries who are here for uni and I just kinda wanna reassure them that its possible. So possible. And if it doesn’t work out then it’s not the distances fault? It wasn’t meant to be. The distance showed sides of your signif other that you didn’t like….. you wouldn’t have seen those sides otherwise. Maybe every relationship needs distance at least once to make it stronger.
True they can be tricky and dangerous to you both as individuals as suddenly you lose sight of yourself and worry about what the other is doing and if they love you and still miss you and if they’re thinking of you or getting their head turned by a sexy red head with no bra or a muscled greek god etc bla bla bla. I think its good to know that actually not talking to each other 24/7 can be beneficial, you can live your own lives and make your own decisions based on what YOU want, not what you think you should do. Then you can happily tell the other one about your choices and they can support you and give you advice when and if needed. It lets you be YOU and them be THEM and when you’re together you’re both stronger individuals for it and happier as a couple. You get what I’m saying? So for anyone out there stuggling with these kind of things, take a step back and live your life as you want to because at the end of the day you’ll regret changing into someone you aren’t or don’t want to be in the long run. Always be true to yourself *cue Stevie Wonder’s ‘True to your Heart’ as played on the credits of critically acclaimed Olive’s fav Disney film ever Mulan.
Okay so this post isn’t just about boys ew, no. Long distance best friendships are crap and great at the same time. You can tell each other about dramas in your life and get totally unbiased opinions that help SO much. Sometimes them being a bit further away from the situation (geographically and emotionally etc) can give you a different perspective on stuff and things and you know what I’m talking about. HOWEVER it’s so easy to assume your best friend(s) is telepathically connected to you so sometimes you forget to tell them important stuff that you should have! In situations like this, WhatsApp’s voice note feature is a blessing because seriously who has the time to write A MASSIVE ESSAY every message….. and it helps you get over your fear of phonecalls if you’re anxiously inclined….it gets you practicing which is helpful yay.
LONG DISTANT PETS like dude seriously, its so sad not cuddling your furry bug but as soon as you’re back with them you appreciate them SO MUCH MORE. Gone are the irritations with the licky noises of her tongue on her grimy blanket and you’re not bummed out when you have to let her out to ‘pee’ for the third time when all she actually wants to do is bark at the darkness to prove she is badass even though she’s only 10 inches high. You know, all those niggly things…well they go away! You love them for them and their fuzziness and don’t care about their flaws because you missed them so damn much.
Conclusion….long distance *controversially* can be a great thing. Except for the lack of hugs..that’s a bastard setback I can’t reason away.